I was told tonight that love is supposed to be unconditional. I apologized for my laughter, and then asked for the example of what unconditional love was supposed to be.
Coming from a Christian upbringing, I already knew what answer would be given:
“God is and shows unconditional love.”
My reply…
Bullshit!
This “unconditional” love is so unconditional that (if you believe what is said) if you don’t do exactly what is expected of you, God will throw you into a lake of fire for all eternity…. condemned to Hell forever.
Talk about conditions!
Love is very conditional.
Treat someone with contempt, bitterness and hatred, and love will eventually go away. Show no respect for the other person, and love will fade. Show no desire for that person, and love disappears.
Love requires intention. It requires attention. It requires that you give all you have to another and that what you have to give matches with what they need. Without that, love has no shot.
Life is conditional.
Stop eating and drinking, stop breathing or hit your heat against the pavement at 50 miles per hour, and life ends. You must be willing to maintain that which you have, meet the conditions needs to keep the life going, or it all falls apart.
So this notion of unconditional anything is nothing more than a fairy tale. It is something that you throw at someone you are not giving what they want… yet expect them to give what you need. To that I say…
Grow up!
Meet the conditions, or watch it all die and fall apart.
Just a random thought… but one I thought worth writing down for myself.
/// RED ///
Coach. Writer. Podcaster.
I help people wake up, break free, and crush the fear that’s been running their lives far too long.
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Red Wrighting is a Certified Life Coach based in North Carolina, working with clients across the U.S. and internationally. He specializes in Fearless Living Coaching and writes about identity, confidence, connection — and the messy, beautiful business of being fully yourself.
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